May I present my stitches?

'Tis the season for Christmas knitting.  The weather turns cold, and knitters everywhere suddenly realize that Christmas is looming, and gifts need to be finished.  And started.

My mother-in-law's Christmas gift scarf, Spring Haven, has been in progress for a while.  I needed another skein of yarn, which I bought last week.  While I was there, I bought the yarn for Mom's Christmas scarf.

Last night, I feel like I wasted the whole two hours of Knitter-vention, because all I did was swatch.  Two pattern and two needles sizes were the contenders, and just when I thought I had it narrowed down. . .I decided to leave the final decision to my Sweetie.

For a straight white man with no knitting interest whatsoever, he has surprisingly good insight in the craft.

The winning pattern had one of the strangest line of directions I have ever seen in my twenty years as a knitter:  "All wrong size rows: work stitches as they present themselves."

As they present themselves?!?!  Are you kidding me?  I mean, I knew what they meant, knit the knits and purl the purls, but it still sounded like the stupidest way to say that.  

Do the stitches walk up, extend a hand, and make introductions?  "Good evening, I am knit, and may I present my dear friend purl."  

Or even better:  "Hi, I'm Knit, this is my sister Purl, this is my other sister Purl."

Who writes these things?

Today, it is all about the salutations.